so...

today was ok...

i spent my morning in bed, watching The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, and crying.

Last night was fun, but sad. needed, i think. it helped me out. (Thanks vix)

Watching that movie mixed with some stuff from last night... it made me think more... about certain things... certain people.

So i took a step. and i cried again.

then i went to work. i was quiet, and doing dishes, which made me happy, cuz then i could dwell over all the possibilites of what could be said and be sad.

had a late rush of people... you know the kind...

cleaned. got prepared for tomorrow.

so i retook the step. and i didn't cry. but i was still.... nervous.

then something happened to take my mind off of things.

then i had to not be distracted anymore.

and it was awkward.

it probably will be for a while. and it'll never be like it was.

we're too different, yet still the same in some respects.

i suppose its a work in progress. both participants just have to be willing to try.

i thought i lost you once. it wouldn't be that hard to lose you again. it wasn't as hard as i thought when i lost you the first time.

today was... awkward. different. quiet.

but needed.

so...

~kisses